Allswell is not well
There is a commercial running on TV that made my blood boil. If I got cut now, my blood would drip onto the carpet burning a hole through ala Aliens. You must have seen the commercial - it is some crappy Allswell herbal drink. I think the couple is in some foodcourt (Vivocity - I swear) when the girl stops the guy from ordering his teh-ping.
Girl : Here, got this for you (hands over the herbal drink).
Guy: (eyes it suspiciously) What is this?
Girl: Drink lah. It is good for your health.
Guy: Eee. Don't want. Uncle, get me one teh-ping . . . .
Girl: (wave frantically at Uncle) Uncle, no need! no need!
Guy: Why you want me to drink this?
Girl : (smile coyly) Because I love you.
Guy : (smile shyly and drinks the shit)
GAY
This commercial is gayer than the pink font I used for the word above. I think the only reason the guy is smiling shyly when he drinks the shit is because the girl is grinding her high-heel shoe into his big toe. Either that, or he is gay.
Or most likely because he just wants to get the SHIT OVER WITH. He is probably thinking "love me, yeah lah yeah lah. Better drink this shit before she nags some more. Wait till she f#% off home then I go order a bucket of KFC and all the teh-ping I can drink. " Yeah, that is how all Singaporean guys think, by the way. Don't think your love can change the world. Your love so strong, go hunt down Mas Selamat lah!
Girl: Heh, go hunt down Mas Selamat.
Guy: Wah, why leh?
Girl: Because I love you.
Guy: YOU GO HUNT YOURSELF! SIAO AH! YOUR LOVE VERY POWDERFUL LAH??!?
Girl: Here, drink this.
Guy: What is this?
Girl: Allswell Herbal tea. Good for you!
Guy: Don't want lah. I want my teh-ping . . .
Girl: You drink this better.
Guy: Why?
Girl: (smile coyly) Because I love you.
Guy: (smile shyly) Well, I love you more. SO DRINK THIS SHIT YOU BOUGHT, BITCH.
The arrogance of Singaporean girls who think their love can change everything is stunning. If you guy wants teh-ping, let him have it. Unless you want a public brawl inside a food court which ends with one party going into A&E with a chopstick in one eye.
Girl : Here, got this for you (hands over the herbal drink).
Guy: (eyes it suspiciously) What is this?
Girl: Drink lah. It is good for your health.
Guy: Eee. Don't want. Uncle, get me one teh-ping . . . .
Girl: (wave frantically at Uncle) Uncle, no need! no need!
Guy: Why you want me to drink this?
Girl : (smile coyly) Because I love you.
Guy : (smile shyly and drinks the shit)
GAY
This commercial is gayer than the pink font I used for the word above. I think the only reason the guy is smiling shyly when he drinks the shit is because the girl is grinding her high-heel shoe into his big toe. Either that, or he is gay.
Or most likely because he just wants to get the SHIT OVER WITH. He is probably thinking "love me, yeah lah yeah lah. Better drink this shit before she nags some more. Wait till she f#% off home then I go order a bucket of KFC and all the teh-ping I can drink. " Yeah, that is how all Singaporean guys think, by the way. Don't think your love can change the world. Your love so strong, go hunt down Mas Selamat lah!
Girl: Heh, go hunt down Mas Selamat.
Guy: Wah, why leh?
Girl: Because I love you.
Guy: YOU GO HUNT YOURSELF! SIAO AH! YOUR LOVE VERY POWDERFUL LAH??!?
Girl: Here, drink this.
Guy: What is this?
Girl: Allswell Herbal tea. Good for you!
Guy: Don't want lah. I want my teh-ping . . .
Girl: You drink this better.
Guy: Why?
Girl: (smile coyly) Because I love you.
Guy: (smile shyly) Well, I love you more. SO DRINK THIS SHIT YOU BOUGHT, BITCH.
The arrogance of Singaporean girls who think their love can change everything is stunning. If you guy wants teh-ping, let him have it. Unless you want a public brawl inside a food court which ends with one party going into A&E with a chopstick in one eye.
posted by Captain Obvious at 9:00 AM
6 Comments:
The ad will make more sense if there is a gender switch.
Guy: Here, drink this.
Girl: What is this?
Guy: Allswell Herbal tea.
Girl: Don't want lah. I want my teh-ping . . .
Guy: You drink this better.
Girl: Why?
Guy: Because I love you.
Girl will melt onto the floor and obediently finished up the herbal tea.
Woman will buy the idea of LOVE. Man will buy the idea of SEX.
Yeah yeah. Great idea.
Guy : Why I need to drink this?
Girl: Because I would have sex with you.
Guy ordered a carton of Allswell on the spot.
Ha ha....
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U ok?
Hmm, what?
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