People ask the dumbest questions
I as poring through the lunch menu at a Lao restaurant the other day when I heard someone at the next table asked the waiter this question:
“This Lao chicken noodles (mee gai) . . . . Is it delicious?”
This question is stupid. It may not be a rhetorical question but it is stupid nevertheless. What do you expect the waiter to say?
“No sir. Are you kidding?! Our chicken noodles suck ass. I would stay far away from it if I were you. The noodles were made from low quality wheat and when we run out of wheat, we actually used pork jello. That’s right, pork jello leh. Don’t believe, right? I also cannot believe. And to cover up the smell and allay your suspicions, we make the broth really salty. Ooh, the broth. We basically pour hot water for 5 minutes over leftover innards of the chicken and bones and call it a “broth”. The chicken meat is so tough and chewy that the man to your right is still chewing it ever since his noodles arrived. 3 hours ago. Don’t be deceived by the picture in the menu. It actually looks like baby worms squirming in blood. Once, when I sampled it myself, I couldn’t even swallow them. The noodles only went half way down my throat and they came right back up again.
Only three men have ordered this chicken noodles before and they are never seen again. (Thunk!) I see the man on your right has fallen over clutching his stomach in pain. Make it four men. So what you get is really a slimy concotion of pain and suffering. Our initial name for his bowl of noodles is tuay jep (Bowl of Eternal Suffering).
So would you like to order a bowl to try?”
But of course, the waiter didn’t say all that. He just smiled and said:
“It is saap (delicious)!” Again, what do we expect waiters to say?
It is like beauty contestants saying “I like to have fun!” Like DUH. You mean, there are people who don’t?
“This Lao chicken noodles (mee gai) . . . . Is it delicious?”
This question is stupid. It may not be a rhetorical question but it is stupid nevertheless. What do you expect the waiter to say?
“No sir. Are you kidding?! Our chicken noodles suck ass. I would stay far away from it if I were you. The noodles were made from low quality wheat and when we run out of wheat, we actually used pork jello. That’s right, pork jello leh. Don’t believe, right? I also cannot believe. And to cover up the smell and allay your suspicions, we make the broth really salty. Ooh, the broth. We basically pour hot water for 5 minutes over leftover innards of the chicken and bones and call it a “broth”. The chicken meat is so tough and chewy that the man to your right is still chewing it ever since his noodles arrived. 3 hours ago. Don’t be deceived by the picture in the menu. It actually looks like baby worms squirming in blood. Once, when I sampled it myself, I couldn’t even swallow them. The noodles only went half way down my throat and they came right back up again.
Only three men have ordered this chicken noodles before and they are never seen again. (Thunk!) I see the man on your right has fallen over clutching his stomach in pain. Make it four men. So what you get is really a slimy concotion of pain and suffering. Our initial name for his bowl of noodles is tuay jep (Bowl of Eternal Suffering).
So would you like to order a bowl to try?”
But of course, the waiter didn’t say all that. He just smiled and said:
“It is saap (delicious)!” Again, what do we expect waiters to say?
It is like beauty contestants saying “I like to have fun!” Like DUH. You mean, there are people who don’t?
posted by Captain Obvious at 7:45 PM
3 Comments:
I was at a Pharmacy when a guy went up to the cashier with a bottle of cream and asked, " Is this safe to use?"
"No, it is not safe at all. In fact, the side effects are severe constipation, dizziness, outbreak of rashes, temporary blindness, permanent deafness and possibly, death.
So you still want to buy one?"
ha ha...
Aiya... People like to ask redundant Q.
Post a Comment
<< Home